This Will Make You Laugh

Last night in a bar in the center of a crowd
I sit accompanied by my peers obnoxious and proud
It began with one man staring deeply into my eyes
Saying some bullshit, I had no reply

I asked him to leave, he was creepin me out
Standing too close, on the wrong route
In return, he blew into my ear
Asking me to dance, my expressions of fear

He was now in my bubble, my personal space
This moment we had, I wish I erased
He looked at my homegirls, said they had sass
Stating hes from Oregon, must mean hes badass

A song comes on, he turns to the dance floor
He made it a point that he was hardcore
Takes this broad from behind; takes off her shirt
Nothing but a creepshow, a repulsive pervert

Trying to get my attention, I hear this voice
But now do I listen? I have to make a choice
I decided to hear, what he had to say
This funny man, was on the straightway

Asked me if I would get on the pole and dance
I responded with no, un un, not a chance
He pondered on how I would talk someone into it
said buy em a drink and keep their grits lit

His challenge: May I buy you a drink, make it a double
I don't drink, I laughed, you must mean trouble
His comeback was good, I was not prepared
He said he knew I was pregnant, oh how he dared

The shit was funny, I gave him mad props
Cookie cutter though, straight from the bakeshop.
I told him you cant have your cake and eat it too
Then he decided to argue and make it an issue

I didn't have time, it was getting late
Told him no, he best relocate
He was persistent, running his mouth
Starting talkin all g like he was reppin the south

About that time, I walk away
He said, baby but wait, its my birthday
What a pathetic fool, indeed a poor guy
Tonight... these... fellas... I asked myself why...

haha true story. Thought you'd like that.